Good soldier Svejk

Good soldier Svejk

Monday, 16 August 2010

Part 3 of Cz Amazing Story in dramatic form!

Svejk jerks gun down, Jorma runs towards them, pulls out gun, Svejk and Mrs. Mullerova continue to struggle.

Svejk: Why, Mrs. Mullerova, why! After all these years!

Jorma: Give up, Mrs. Mullerova! We’ll let you go!

Mrs. Mullerova continues to struggle with less conviction, pauses and gives up, collapses in tears, Svejk throws gun away, kneels beside her.

Svejk: Why are you crying? We promised we wouldn’t kill you, and we weren’t lying!

Mrs Mullerova: But I tried to kill you! I deserve to die!
Shaking her head, mumbles tearfully: I should have said no, I should have said no…

Jorma: Grunts: What are you talking about?

Mrs Mullerova: Hysterically: The Mafia! They forced me, I had no choice! They said they’d kill my family if I didn’t do as they said!
Turning to Svejk: They told me all I had to do was keep you calm, under control, stop you from causing trouble… they only gave me the gun ‘as a precaution’ they said. Nothing would happen, they were just covering every chance, and it would all be over soon… And then this afternoon, I panicked. I didn’t know what to do! Please, sir, I didn’t know what to do, please understand…
Gasping: My family…

Mrs. Mullerova sobs loudly

Svejk: Ok, Mrs. Mullerova. It’s all ok. We understand. We won’t hurt you, we’re going now. You’ll be ok.
Stands up: Come on, Mr. Påtter. We have to go.

Mrs Mullerova: No.
Others turn in surprise: No.

Svejk: Why not, Mrs. Mullerova?

Mrs Mullerova: Because the mafia weren’t lying, Svejk, and you’re not dead…

Lunges for him, scene closes.


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Open new scene, Svejk and Jorma asleep on floor in sleeping bags, Svejk having nightmare & moaning, wakes up gasping, Jorma also wakes.


Jorma: What’s wrong?

Svejk: I had a nightmare… about Ms Mullerova. I don’t want to think about it.

Jorma: Fine. We have to go soon anyway, good thing you woke us up.
Leaves stage, muttering: All the same, I wouldn’t have complained about another 10 minutes…

Svejk: How far will we get today?

Jorma re-enters stage carrying large bag, starts putting sleeping bags into it.


Jorma: To Paris. We’ll take the eurostar overnight and be in London late tonight. It’ll be safe to book a hotel room there; the Mafia aren’t as bad there as they are here. We’ll be able to find someone neutral who can get us weapons and…

Svejk looks aghast, interrupts in incredulous voice.


Svejk: Weapons? No-one said anything about weapons!

Jorma: Svejk, do you honestly think The Mafia, of all people, are going to be O.K. with us snooping around investigating them? We’re not even official! We need to protect ourselves! Otherwise we’ll never se the light of day again, let alone the truth!

Svejk: Well… if you’re sure… what about Irina? When do we see her?

Jorma: As soon as we’ve got the guns. Svejk gasps, Jorma holds up his hand: I know you don’t believe me on this, Svejk, but Irina is one of them, and she’ll be just as eager to kill you as Ms Mullerova was…

Svejk: Angrily: Don’t say her name!

Calms down, continues.


Svejk: Alright. We’ll do it. But I’m warning you, if I have to kill someone just because they’re in the wrong bunch, even if they don’t want to be, I’m out. If it comes to it, I’ll get myself killed. Butt I won’t kill innocent people.

Jorma pauses before replying.


Jorma: Ok. I don’t blame you for those conditions, so I can live with that much. But if you try saving someone in the mafia, I’ll stop you. You can walk away, but you won’t get in my way. But if it comes to it, I hope you’ll be brave and stick with me. Now lets get going…

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